DO I HAVE TO PUT UP WITH IT?
When you can't change a situation...either put up with it or walk away. When we can't change a situation and instead adapt do we end up coping in an unhealthy or healthy way?
Unhealthy:
-I keep quiet and let them have their way. It's not worth fighting over.
-I complain behind their backs.
-I shut down emotionally.
-I don't say what I mean, fearing I'll get in trouble or losing control.
-I subtly signal my disapproval.
-I engage in endless arguments no one wins.
-I feel stressed when I grin and bear it: headache, anxiety, depression, knots in my stomach.
-I convince myself that I should stick it out
-I have feelings of revenge
Healthy:
-I assess what works for me and avoid what doesn't
-I approach the difficult person as rationally as possible
-I avoid emotional drama with them
-I don't dwell on their behavior or complain behind their backs
-I keep away from the perpetual complainers,, gossips and connivers.
-I don't feel trapped and know I can walk away whenever I have to
-I don't rationalize a hopeless situation that has too many unhealthy ingredients which makes the relationship with the difficult person non- productive for both.
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